Thursday, January 03, 2008

This Dating Thing

So I said this blog would contain some dating content ... guess I better get on that.

Where, oh where, do I start?? Let's see, how about a little background. I was married to my High School Sweetheart, Mike. We met when I was 14, just turning 15. That should tell you just how much "dating" experience I have. I have never really dated ... ever. So I decided to try on-line dating. I signed up on I chose this route for a couple reasons. First, I don't have time to hang out at bars or clubs trying to meet someone ... and I'm pretty sure that isn't the kind of guy I'm looking for. Secondly, it's a good pre-screening process. We can exchange a few emails, and a couple phone calls before we meet. Kind of have a good idea what I'm getting into before that first date. I was amazed at how many guys you can weed out this way.

There are all these weird rules and games, and I'm not sure what the fuck I'm doing. I know for sure, I hate the games, what's this shit where you're supposed to wait to call someone after a date? I mean, you either like them or you don't...period. Why does a guy think he needs to wait 2 days to call me if he likes me? Who made that up? The part that is really hard for me is that I just say what I'm thinking, I'm pretty open ... that is hard for some. But really, I'm not interested in dating 100 guys, I just want to find the right guy and pray that I don't have to date 100 guys to find him. I've been on a handful of first dates, I think 6 or 7. Only 2 of them have gotten to date #2. Let me share some of my experiences ....

The guy with 6 kids - Yes that's right 6 kids!!!!!! OMG, way too many, I don't know if it was a good or bad thing, but they came from 3 different wives. Needless to say I now ask how many kids and how many marriages in the first couple conversations. Also, I didn't like his voice when we spoke on the phone ... that should have been my first clue that he wasn't the one! NEXT

Fat Ass Chiropractor - Now, I'm not one to be a stickler about weight, I mean I've got a few to loose myself. But the pictures on my profile are current. I don't think you really gained 50lbs in the last 6 months ... and if you did, well you've got an even bigger problem. Don't start out lying from the start, is that so much to ask? I was really disappointed in this guy ... I so wanted free chiropractic care...anyway. NEXT

Newly Divorced - Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, we've all just come out of a bad relationship. Seriously, you need to be OVER the person you just left before you jump back in the dating pool. I think it's good to review the BIG reasons why you split from your last (one or two) relationships, but it shouldn't be part of every conversation you have with your new prospects. NEXT

Dance Card - First, if you're only 5'9" then say that on your profile ... especially if you are going to tell me you lied on the first date. I'm only 5' 2" ... I'd probably never know or ask how tall you are. No connection after the kiss, but he seemed nice enough ... I would have considered a 2nd date, but I certainly wasn't calling up Kim after the date saying how great it was. So then later in the week I get this email with some lame ass line about his dance card is filling up and has a bunch of dates (dude you're not that cute) to get through, so that is why he wouldn't be calling right away. It was hard to tell if I was being blown off, just weird. Kim and I had a good laugh about it! I mean really, the spark is either there or it isn't, right? If you aren't into me, that is fine ... be honest about it, odds are I'm not really into you either! NEXT

To Date or Not to Date - This guy was all right, we had a fun date. Laughed a lot, there was a little spark. He asked me out on a 2nd date, just after our kiss. And I'm not talking date date, he was willing to go to my work Christmas Party just to spend a little time with me ... Good sign right? Says, I'll call you tomorrow. Ok, cool. I mean, he was nice and I would have liked to get to know him better, but he was kind of runner up to Mr. GQ (we'll talk about him later, he'll get his own post). I felt a little bad about that, since he told me that he doesn't like to date more than one person at a time. I didn't say anything on the subject either way, but did feel a little bad that I would be dating him and Mr. GQ. Maybe he sensed something ... I don't know. But I got an email later in the week, after he didn't call, saying that his heart wasn't into the on-line dating thing, and he was just going to stay single for the time being. First, what does meeting on-line have to do with actually dating someone? Second, why'd ya ask me out if you want to be single? If you aren't into me, that is fine ... be honest about it. NEXT

Well there are two more men to discuss, but these guys have some potential and will be getting their own posts where I'll go into more detail.

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